Kim Allen: Dharma Talk: From False Strength to True Strength

So this notion of strength, and I gave this frame of false strength and true strength, we can, there's many ways to access that or discover what that means, and the mindfulness of the body is one approach, I think that can help differentiate those. This word, this framing wasn't used by the Buddha directly, but I think it's intuitive, is that the, we may have noticed this in our practice, is that the facade we carry around of who we are and our roles and our views and the ways that we try to control and manage our life in that way is a kind of false strength to it. We think we're being tough or putting up a good front or something, but we feel that behind it we're a little scared, we're a little unsure, we're unconfident, and I'm not at all making that out to be, you know, this is immediately bad and you're wrong if you're doing this, this is the human way, you know, and we also manifest that through tensions that we're holding in our body that we discover through meditation, right, the tension in our shoulders, the fears keeping them up here, you know, in our gut, in our belly, tensions in places that aren't even physiological, you know, the shoulder, there's nothing wrong with our shoulder, but we happen to have some memory stored there or something. There's a lot of information about this in Dharma world. I just call all of that the false strength, the strength of holding something tight, essentially, and the Dharma offers us a possibility of transitioning to a more real kind of strength. It's not an easy transition because we have to let go of things that we thought were making us strong, but they weren't. We know that. Just among us we can omit that, but it takes a while. It is a process and one process we can use is mindfulness of the body to become more and more connected to our real physical, inhabited, present moment experience and many practices in the mind to help release the fear and the grasping and the anger and the other things that are those fronts we're putting up. There's an image in the teachings of a Naga, which is a powerful mythological dragon-like being. It's the Buddhist dragon version of dragon, and that's the image given for the awakened mind. You know, we are becoming something quite powerful, and I don't think we should shy away from that. It's not a worldly power kind of thing. The Buddha often contrasted being a king with being a Buddha, right? And they both have power, but it's a different kind. And so we only touched into a portion of this today, but I like to do these things experientially. It's that a continuity of mindfulness in the body can lead to a denser experience of sensation in the body, things that are more subtle that we kind of ignore in our busyness to get this done, use the body for that, use the body to move the head over there so we can do something, right? Instead, we can develop a continuity of mindfulness of this present bodily experience that leads to this density of sensation that's described right here in the texts as images of fullness or strength. And there's actually three of them. We only did one, one pair of the empty and the full jug, but I want to talk about the all three of them because they're each has a different aspect of fullness or strength that may speak to one or more of you in different ways. So find your image, if you will. So they're the first contrasting image. This is the one that gives Mara an opportunity. The first one given is actually a mound of wet clay into which a person throws a heavy stone ball. You get that image right. There's a collapsing. And this is the image for Mara confined an opportunity in someone who doesn't have mindfulness of the body. We're just penetrated by things that come in. Maybe somebody says something to us that's not very welcome. We can collapse in the face of that a literal feeling of collapse in the body. And I remember also a time I was meditating early in my practice and I was actually having some concentration start to come or some beginning of samadhi. And I felt my body sitting quite straight and it felt nice and a thought of sensual desire, actually a sexual thought went through my mind and my spine softened. Like I literally felt not as dramatically as I'm doing it before the camera now, but I literally felt a softening of the energy that I had felt in my spine before. So there you go. Mara can enter and it changes the strength of the body. It was a powerful lesson for me. And again, it doesn't mean that was a wrong thing that happened. It was a demonstration of oh, there's weakness when the mind is unprotected like this. And so that's one and then the contrasting image to that is a door made of hardwood solid strong to against which you throw a light ball of string and it just bounces off. So light ball of string against a wooden door or heavy stone ball into a mound of wet clay feel the difference of those. And so the mindfulness of the body is that there's this sense of hardwood, a sense of an uprightness, a strength, a solidity in this case, but we don't mean in a rigid sense. I think wood is not as rigid as some some things could be. So it's a nice image. Mara doesn't find an opportunity light ball of string against the door. And then the second image given is different. It's the image of when the mind is vulnerable, not well protected by mindfulness of the body. It's like a dry stick, a piece of dry tinder and a spark comes and the tinder goes up in flame. This is the aversive mind so easy to be provoked. Can you be provoked by things just like dry tinder of the spark lands on it. There are minds like this sometimes the minds like this for any of us easily provoked, let's say. And so that's an image that's a mind that's vulnerable, vulnerable to a spark hitting it. You read the news and you get all inflamed by it. That's a mind that's not strong. And then the contrasting image is a wet, sappy stick soaked in water and in a flame. You know, it's a you know, you come along and rub it together like to create fire. Nothing happens. You can't make a fire out of a stick like that. This is a bummer when you're camping. But it's not a bummer when you have mindfulness of the body and you can't be provoked. So Mara comes along and he tries to provoke you. Hey Kim, what about that, you know, thing you're worried about? What about that comment somebody made yesterday? Yeah, they shouldn't have said that. Nope. That doesn't happen. So nope, sorry Mara. Not going to be provoked by that. We feel that in the body. You know, and that's maybe starting to be related to this water image, which we'll do next. But we for the body is filled with the water of the nourishment of the breath of the body sensations. It's like a moisture, a moisture that comes into the system. Concentration images are often about moisture. And it's like the body is filled, contented. It doesn't need to get inflamed. It can't get inflamed. Can't get hot under the collar. And then the third image is the one that we meditated on. It's a jug that's empty, hollow. And Mara can, water can be poured into it so easily. Someone comes along with water, they just pour it right in. No protection against that. We're influenceable. Influence literally means flow in. We're influenceable by things. And remember, we're talking about Mara. So it means we're influenced by unwholesome things. It's okay to be influenced by wholesome things. I don't think that gets affected. But we're influenceable. And so, you know, this is a mind that's not clear. I think this is kind of pointing to delusion in some ways. Like, we're not clear. We're doubtful. Somebody comes and, you know, gives us a hard sell on something and we buy it. We believe it. We're sucked into things and filled with things. Whereas, you know, I know that for me, Mara can come along in the form of voices that sound like lawyers. They have these explanations for why this is justified and why this is true. And they have a whole case laid out. And I can buy into that sometimes. And then I can realize later, I don't know what I was thinking, you know, that's not true or that's overblown in some ways or playing on my fears in some ways. And so when we fill, when we're filled with the water, the jug is full, things can come along, but they can't, they can't put any more into a full jug. I'm already clear. I know what I'm doing here. I'm meditating right now. I don't, I'm not going to be thrown into some other story about something I can't be influenced into believing that it's really a time to go clean the refrigerator. I shouldn't be sitting, you know, what about all that stuff that has to get done? You know, that's Mara just trying to fill something in. So when we're full, we're content. We know what we're doing because this is our value. We've set aside this half hour for meditation. We can't be influenced. So that's this other image and Mara doesn't find an entry. So I love these images. They each have a different dimension. Pick the one that feels right for you. But we know when Mara is having his way with us and when, you know, when there's that stability and strength, inner strength, then he can't. So these are nice images. Now this is not to go on in the Sutta. These images are not the goal, but the mindfulness of the body Sutta 119 has a lot, a lot of concentration images and it's very easy to go into states of Samadhi through the body. And so that's a lot of it. But interestingly, after these images about Mara not finding an opportunity, you know, such that we can practice the Janas, if you will, or any kind of Samadhi, it, the next images that are given are ones of allowing that strength to be used for what? For insight, for wisdom. We know that that's where the Buddha points us. It's never an end just to find stability and sit there. That's, that's not what awakening is. So interestingly, one of the images is releasing water. Actually, two of the images are about releasing water. So, you know, one is it says that one is directly like the jug image. It says suppose set out on a stand, there were a water jug full of water right up to the brim so that crows could drink from it. Wherever a strong man, there's the strength, a strong man tips it, water would come out in any direction that a strong person tips a full jug, water comes out. So now the strength is that is is the strength that we've cultivated. There's the strength of concentration, clarity of continuity of mindfulness. And any way that we want to use the mind, we water sitting in a jug isn't that useful. We're supposed to drink it or wash with it or use it to water plants. And so we can use that mind. And then it's clear what we should use it for. It says so when anyone has developed a cultivated mindfulness of the body, then when he inclines his mind toward realizing any state that may be realized by direct knowledge, he attains the ability to witness that there being a suitable basis. So you see that the strength that's cultivated is very clearly said to be a basis for seeing. That's what we do. We cultivate a mind that can't be knocked aside by the wholesome mind states that come in, it can't be knocked aside. And then we use that to see, I mean, this is a concise application, the concise description of the Buddhist path through images of an empty jug, which is then filled to a state of strength, which has been used in kind towards seeing. And then there's also an image of an embankment or a square pond with an embankment. And you, it means like something like a wall around it. And anywhere that you open the wall, the water can flow out. And in the same way, a person would be able to see anything that they wanted to see if their mind were strong. And then third one changes a little bit for completeness, we'll include it, which is that there's a chariot here on even ground at the crossroads. And he has a chariot that's harnessed to thoroughbreds. Thoroughbred is another image that's used for the concentrated mind. The mind is like a horse. It is an excellent horse, you know, that's ready to be used for something. And it says here, a skilled trainer, a chariot here of horses, could mount that chariot and taking the reins could drive out and back by any road whenever he likes. And in the same way, a person who has cultivated mindfulness of the body to the point of strength could see anything that they want to see in any direction they look, they will see what is needed to attain true knowledge. I love these images, you know. So these are powerful images. And I would like to say that this is a model of strength without aggression of power used for good, you know, for seeing, for liberating the mind. And it's going to take some strength. You can't do it from a position of weakness. And so we're developing power or strength, not so that we can have power over something, not even over Mara, but so that harmful states can't have power over us. That's why we develop strength. So Mara isn't strong, to us anymore. It's interesting, I have a memory of, I was teaching a metasuit at one time. You might be saying, where's the meta that sounds so powerful and cold? I was teaching the metasuit at one time to a group. And it has that line in it about how when we're sending meta to absolutely all beings everywhere, and it says, you know, the great or the mighty medium or shorter, small, those near and far away, it's so inclusive. That line, the great or the mighty, that's the first thing that said that we category that we should have meta for somebody raise their hand after I read the whole metasuit and said, feel how inclusive it is. And she said, yeah, but when you talked about having meta for the great or the mighty, I don't know about that. That doesn't really sit for me. And I was struck that she equated having any kind of power with evil or harm. Someone with power is surely bad. I thought, wasn't the Buddha powerful? Wasn't the Buddha a power figure? Yeah. So I don't know if the Buddha needs our meta, but you know, might and power are, I think, encouraged when they're wholesome. And yeah, the metasuit is a bit broader than that. We are supposed to even extend meta to those who don't use their power well. We're not teaching that we're not getting into that today. But if you were powerful enough, you might be okay with that. You might feel confident enough that you could strengthen yourself by extending meta even to people who don't use their power well. So then the other side of that is if you're dismayed by corruption or ill use of power by any chance in today's world, make your mind strong enough that it's uncorruptible. Make yourself uncorruptible and uninfluensible by what is unwholesome. That's a proper response to seeing that out in the world. And that strength comes from practice. It's one kind of strength. Yeah, there are other kinds of course. So these are my thoughts on mindfulness of the body as a way of strengthening ourselves in a wholesome way. And I'll pause there and open it up. Questions? Bruce. So what comes up for me about this, Cam, and it's really in the form of a question, is does one have to be mindful of the body to do this? Or could we be mindful of any of the objects of mindfulness in the Satipatanasutra? That's an interesting question. I think any of the Satipatanas are implied to be paths all the way to awakening. I just noticed in particular that the Sutta on mindfulness of the body includes these very rich images that seem to speak to this aspect of it. But I think there are plenty of practices that focus more on the mind, like the Ute Jania practice, for instance. I think that too would make a mind have this kind of inner strength because you would see so clearly the contents of the mind. You couldn't be fooled. I was also thinking of this in terms of right effort in a way, keeping unskillful mind states from the horizon. Exactly. That's great. That's a great connection. This would be a preventing, essentially. Thank you. Nice. Victor. You didn't say this explicitly, but it seems like this strength that you're referring to is related to the Enlightenment factor or the spiritual faculty of Virya. Then these deeper sensations in the body that occur when the more superficial sensations aren't there, seems almost metabolic in a way. Energy arising in the body, warmth. I've heard it said that the body has the strength of a 12 watt light bulb, but we are radiating energy. That seems to be a very pleasant sensation. I'm wondering between the connection between those kinds of sensations and the Enlightenment factor or the Jhana factor of PT. I wonder, that doesn't matter what the labels are, I guess, but just in order to try to relate it to the teachings in some way. Yeah, I would think so. I pointed to during the meditation if there's any sense of well-being arising, because I was feeling some PT. I think Virya leads to PT. This is the connection that's being explored through this. Then if it's a wholesome form of energy and PT coming in, it will rise and then settle into tranquility and samadhi, which are interesting states. We think of tranquility as being very calm and light, and it can be. But there's actually a very strong energy in presence to samadhi. Well, it's talked about the balancing of the energizing and the calming factors and not going off on one end or the other, but finding that middle way. Yeah, when the calming factors start to come in, we don't lose the energizing ones. Interestingly, it just gets added on. The calm gets added on to the energy. Thank you. Steve. You touched on this briefly, the idea of, I think you even used the word lifeline. I'm not sure if you used that word or not. But this idea of the strength that it takes to do certain things, the strength that it takes to grasp something. We grasp these unconscious belief systems that are so pathogenic, but we hold to them because they have survived, they had survival value. And that sense of needing to retain them is really strong. So it takes this other kind of strength to release that. Oh, that's a nice way of saying it. It's not only what we're letting go of, it's what we're letting go into. So we, at some point, we realize, oh, the strength that I'm holding this old habit with, first of all, it's tiring because this is strength that is draining, whereas the strength that we were cultivating in the meditation is energizing. But not only that, it's weak. If I were to let it go, this stronger, yet stronger energy based on the dharma, based on refuge, would arise that is much more protective. The clenching of those things sounds like, feels like an existential imperative. It does feel like that, but that means you're getting close to being able to release it. It's actually really, really exhausting. And it's such a relief to open those fists. Judy. Hi. So I had just a quick question about when you're getting sort of like the strength. I guess when we were, first of all, this meditation and the teaching is really incredible. So thank you so much. It was incredible. When I was getting like the strength in the body, I was thinking that I'm too weak to sort of like stand out for myself and be assertive for my values a lot of times. But then in the second, and it sort of felt like impossible to do what the instructions were. But then in the second meditation, you talked about, wait, just one second, I remember. Shoot, I got nervous. I forgot. I'm sorry. It's okay. I think you, yeah, if you come up with it in the next 30 seconds or so, let me know. Thank you. And I'm glad that the meditation was good for you and brought about a change. Yeah. Thank you. Anything else? Oh, Judy, go for it. Okay. In the second meditation, we talked about the strength to see. And then that sort of took off the onerous of me to having to like say and stand up for myself and be assertive because that maybe is not the first thing that I'm learning. The first thing is the s